#NamesInYourPhone: “DO NOT ANSWER!”

— Frank Ocean (@frank_ocaen) July 21, 2012

My dad changed his name to Darth Vader then proceeded to send me a text saying, ‘Luke, I am your father.’ #NamesInYourPhone

— Luke Brown (@gr4sshopp3r) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone “the one who’s ejaculation made you swim for your life.. literally” for my dad

— undercover lover † (@peniscolada_) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone “Half Blood Prince” “Chosen One” “He who must not be named” “Brightest witch” “The ginger” “The BAMF” “Loony”

— нαяяy.яση.нєямισηє.ϟ (@PotterChosenOne) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone Cafe girl, Dasha, Felipe, Flavio, Grid Girl, Hotel girl, Kimi, Mama, Stephanieo, Raquel, Random Russian, Vivian, Xenia

— Fake Fernando Alonso (@FakeFernando) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone: “Lucifer” AKA my mother.

— ←THIS AMAZING GUY! (@bricemak) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone Taylor Swift. I don’t have her number, but her contact is pre-saved in case I did get it….

— Leann Sellers (@Leannbaybee) July 21, 2012

*Remember, She Cheated* is calling#NamesInYourPhone

— Kenny (@SpriteDucky) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone I’ve named everybody “Felicity”, “Felicity 1″, “Felicity 2″, etc. Including my dad. He’s Felicity 24.

— Brian Limond (@DaftLimmy) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone Jake From State Farm.

— Milton. (@ReaIMilton) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone The Chinese Place across the street

— Mike™ (@ipostz) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhoneBlond bimbo, Blond big boobed bimbo, Daddy Issues, Ranjit, Thinks I’m Ted, Lusty Leopard bouncer, Robin’s hot coworker.

— Barney Stinson (@AwsomeStinson) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone twitter.com/_NBAamazing/st…

— ‘ (@_NBAamazing) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone Lmaoo twitter.com/TheChristian_M…

— Christian Mendez (@TheChristian_M) July 21, 2012

#NamesInYourPhone twitter.com/SarahTeo11/sta…

— Sarah Teo (@SarahTeo11) July 21, 2012

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