Now that it has been proven that white men can jump, let’s take a look at the best tweets about Felix Baumgartner Jump.

https://twitter.com/Parkjaydrive/status/257556673596624898

Don’t try it with IOS6, you’ll end up in a small village in Pakistan

Felix Baumgartner may have broken the sound barrier in freefall but he’s still named Felix Baumgartner.

— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) October 15, 2012

Comes from a guy named Dwight

“Did it hurt?… When you fell from your space balloon?” (good pick-up line to use on Felix Baumgartner)

— Aaron Fullerton (@AaronFullerton) October 14, 2012

Romantic fellow, hope it works better than “Roses are red, violets are blue, i’m Felix Baumgartner and I will fall over you”

I invited my mom to stay at my house for 2 days, I’d like to see Felix Baumgartner try and top that. #Daredevil

— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) October 14, 2012

You win, by far, you win

Definitely going as slutty Felix Baumgartner for halloween.

— Julie (@metricjulie) October 14, 2012

Any sentence with halloween, slutty and Felix Baumgartner sounds cool

I’d say Felix Baumgartner is a pretty down-to-earth guy.

— Vernon Dursley (@Dursleytime) October 14, 2012

Brace yourselves, RedBull jokes are coming:

Why does Felix Baumgartner use a parachute? I thought a redbull gave you wings.

— Minerva McGonagall (@_McGonagall_) October 14, 2012

Just saw a Pensioner do a Sort of Tribute to Felix Baumgartner. Yep. He Drank a Can of Red Bull and then Fell down an Escalator.

— Jon Pigeon (@PigeonJon) October 14, 2012

Difference between me and Felix Baumgartner is that when I drink Red Bull, I just stay up and tag all my music by genre.

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) October 14, 2012

The lazies:

Felix Baumgartner tweeted from space then broke the sound barrier. I’m tweeting this from bed. I give up. You win this time, Baumgartner.

— Kelkulus (@kelkulus) October 14, 2012

Felix Baumgartner jumped out of a space capsule in an attempt to break records. I jumped off my couch in an attempt to get more ice cream.

— Chloe Lamb (@TheChloeLamb) October 14, 2012

The sports fans:

BREAKING: #FelixBaumgartner took so long to touch down that the Tennessee Titans offered him a 3 year $21 million dollar deal.

— Not Bill Walton (@NotBillWalton) October 14, 2012

https://twitter.com/Giggsy99/status/257731345357361152

With all the elections projections going on people are getting mighty political. They are like the 30th of February, they come every 4 years. What a better way to express thyself than hashtagging on twitter?

Let’s start with the Obama sympathizers, #THANVOTEFORROMNEY

I’d rather start using myspace again #thanvoteforromney

— Nightwing (@Nightwing614) October 13, 2012

Coincidenatlly Justin Timberlake feels the same way

Go out wearing crocs than #thanvoteforromney

— glam girl probz (@glamgirlprobzz) October 13, 2012

I’d rather listen to Rebecca Black sing #thanvoteforromney

— Haha One Liners™ (@HahaOneLiners) October 13, 2012

I’d rather be sorted into Hufflepuff #thanvoteforromney

— Jonathan Millhouse (@JMillhouse) October 13, 2012

C’mon people don’t exaggerate….

Id rather take a bus driver uppercut #thanvoteforromney 

— ╭∩╮（︶︿︶）╭∩╮(@IMsoFAMOUSbitxh) October 13, 2012

Here’s the video

I’d rather kidnap Liam Neeson’s daughter and face the consequences #thanvoteforromney

— jocy estrada (@jocyweenieee) October 13, 2012

Not if Romney can show you his very special set of skills first

I’d rather step on legos barefoot #ThanVoteForRomney

— Nicholas Silva (@SicholasNilva) October 13, 2012

i’d rather hire amanda bynes as my driver #thanvoteforromney

— Stacie (@breadquanda) October 13, 2012

I’d rather move to Canada #thanvoteforRomney

— Brian♥Ryan (@batsfuckstars) October 13, 2012

I’d rather be Snooki’s kid #thanvoteforromney

— BlameItOnMyAdhd (@AyoColeman) October 13, 2012

Now the Romney sympathizers, #THANVOTEFOROBAMA

I’d rather never eat bacon ever again #thanvoteforObama

— Savannah (@thesavvy) October 13, 2012

Blasphemy!!

I’d rather have Casey Anthony run a daycare #ThanVoteForObama

— LibRipper (@buzzkill4708) October 13, 2012

Make sure you take your kids already bathe.

I’d rather have a conjugal visit with Jerry Sandusky#ThanVoteForObama

— Soledad O’bama (@CaptYonah) October 13, 2012

Sounds like fun, make sure to take some blue pills

I’d rather hire Lindsey Lohan as my personal driver #thanvoteforObama

— Mallamutt (@Mallamutt) October 13, 2012

Wait….what about Amanda?

I’d rather shave my balls in an earthquake #thanvoteforObama

— Jack Merritt (@Jaqueezy) October 13, 2012

I would rather give Debbie Wasserman Shultz a bikini wax #thanvoteforObama

— Melissa (@1mom4mitt) October 13, 2012

Hairy situations.

I’d rather get a hand job from Edward Scissorhands #thanvoteforObama

— Edward Emerling (@edemerling) October 13, 2012

“Edward…i was joking, stop, Edward STHAP!!”

Which group had the most creative elections projections tweets?

Also make sure to check out the best tweets from #DemocratMovies and #RepublicanMovies

Sushi rice not perfectly sticky? Slightly overcooked pigeon? Under seasoned crudo? Pretentious Sommelier?

You’re not alone, you filthy rich first world human. DaCritics has found the worst reviews of the most expensive restaurant in the U.S.

Masa, NYC
Average Check Total: $1,269

Daniel, NYC
Average check total: $408

Jean-Georges, NYC
Average check total: $410

Herbfarm, Seattle
Average check total: $411

Chef’s Table, Brooklyn
Average check total: $450

Alinea, Chicago
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French Laundry, Yountville
Average Check Total: $800

Urasawa, Beverly Hills
Average Check Total: $1,111